Saturday, May 28, 2005

Another baby....

I'm crazy for starting this. I have a 6-year-old daughter and a 16-month-old son, and I'm maybe a month away from publishing a book for women thinking of becoming single moms. Because I haven't made any serious income in two years--due to the book-writing process -- I'm finally starting to take some freelance writing assignments. I'm itching to return to writing a novel I shelved a while ago...my house is never clean...the plants aren't getting watered...bills are lost in my office...my toddler has misplaced a Netflix movie that arrived more than a month ago and I don't even know where to look next....I don't have nearly enough child care time, or social time, or writing time...and the school year is ending for my daughter, who will now need more attention and transportation from me. Yet I'm committing myself to write my brains out to a completely unknown audience.

This is the mentality that led me to have two kids on my own in the first place. I love a new challenge.

So what will I do with this vehicle? Help others? Organize my thoughts? Dispense information? Vent?

I think the main goal should be to be honest. The book talks about the realities of this choice -- the ups and downs -- and includes anecdotes from myself and others about what it takes to raise kids on our own. But by necessity it doesn't dwell on the daily/weekly issues, since there was already so much to talk about in nearly 400 pages! Maybe this is where women can turn to find out, really, what it's all about, day in and day out. Life as mom, life as author, life as independent woman who is 43 and trying to find a way to balance my goals as an individual with my responsibilities to two young children who need me.

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